Market Reports

If Only We’d Dug Sooner

The early bird gets the dysprosium.

8 hrs ago •

Fort Knox Wants Its Cult Back

Now, after a 50% year, you want gold?

Oct 14 •

Trump Relights the Tariff Fuse

Market Report for Friday, October 10, 2025

Oct 11 •

Back to Believing Again

Market Report for Wednesday, October 8, 2025

Oct 8 •

Oracle Rents the AI Revolution at Dollar Store Margins

Market Report for Tuesday, October 7, 2025

Oct 7 •

Wall Street Discovers Gridlock Is the New Stimulus

Market Report for Sunday, October 5, 2025

Oct 5 •

Stocks Rally on Hopes Congress Stays Shut Forever

Market Report for Thursday, October 2, 2025

Oct 2 •

Pfizer Cures Medicaid, CoreWeave Cures Boredom

Market Report for Tuesday, September 30, 2025

Sep 30 •

Rate-Cut Unicorn Flees Toward Hills

Market Report for Thursday, September 25, 2025

Sep 25 •

Dow Jonesing for Lithium

Market Report for Wednesday, September 24, 2025

Sep 24 •

Powell Discovers Valuations

Market Report for Tuesday, September 23, 2025

Sep 23 •

AI Buys the World a Coke

Market Report for Monday, September 22, 2025

Sep 22 •

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